[Editor: This poem by “Dryblower” Murphy was published in The Sunday Times (Perth, WA), 25 August 1912.]
Tinned Dog!
Brisbane wire:—
Harry Baynes, a master butcher, examined before the Meat Commission to-day, said that his firm exported beef. If a Federal inspector condemned any meat it was not allowed to be exported. The meat was allowed to be tinned for consumption in Australia.
Hear the candid Queensland cove,
Mark this confidential cuss,
Hear the solemn truth he hove
At Australia — which is us.
Bull must have our primest beef,
Anything for us will do;
Bullocks, mostly skin and grief,
Constitute our Irish stew.
And while this butcher bold
Speaks his pungent epilogue,
A reverb’rant echo rolled—
“Tinned dog!”
From the Palmer unto Perth,
From hot Bundaberg to Broome,
Grub from off the bullock’s girth
In our tummies found a tomb.
We have watched the sizzling steak
On the mulga embers red,
Where the stamps the world awake
And the bullion leaves its bed.
Near where Bayley made his brass
And the lock-up was a log,
Oft we asked a mate to pass
“Tinned dog.”
But believe me, mates o’ mine,
We were not in earnest quite,
When to camp we’d hungry line
In the morning, noon or night;
“Dog” we called it time and oft;
“Dog” it still remains to-day,
Though some who with us scoffed
Are now decomposing clay.
When a nigger made a row
For a portion of our prog,
It was always “Give the cow
Tinned dog!”
When Kurnalpi woke the world,
When Jack Reidy made his punch,
And the blowflies swarmed and swirled
Where the battlers bolted lunch,
We had notions vague and dim,
When the subject we’d discuss,
On Australia’s Eastern rim,
All the best was tinned for us.
What we thought was only wit
Was as good as Decalogue,
As we called the beef we bit
“Tinned dog.”
Now, we learn from Butcher Baynes
Britain pinches all our prime,
While the mullock that remains
Is consumed within this clime,
’Neath the old red, blue and white
Bull the cag-mag loudly scorns,
While contentedly we bite
Ancient hoofs and crumpled horns.
Here we’re thankful to devour
All that cannot pass the best,
While the Englishman goes sour
If he doesn’t bite the best.
With ingredients of glue
Our interiors we clog,
But the poms. are few who chew
Tinned dog!
— DRYBLOWER.
Source:
The Sunday Times (Perth, WA), 25 August 1912, p. 8 (First Section)
Editor’s notes:
battler = someone who is not rich, battling against life’s odds; a poor person
Bayley = Arthur Bayley (1865-1896) was a gold prospector who discovered gold at Fly Flat (also known as Bayley’s Find), Western Australia on 17 September 1892, sparking a gold rush to the area, which led to the establishment of the town of Coolgardie
brass = (slang) money
Broome = a town located on the northern coast of Western Australia
Bull = John Bull: a personification of Britain, or of England in particular
the bullion leaves its bed = a reference to taking gold from the ground
Bundaberg = a city located on the south-eastern coast of Queensland
cag-mag = (also spelt “cagmag”) a tough old goose; inferior meat (derived from “cagmag”, meaning coarse or tough goose meat); any type of inferior food; something which is inferior, has been done shoddily or has been left incomplete (can also refer to: chatting idly, gossiping)
clime = a place, region, or foreign land, particularly referred to with regard to its climate (usually used in the plural, e.g. “cooler climes”, “hot climes”, “lovely climes”, “Northern climes”, “other climes”, “Southern climes”, “sunny climes”, “warmer climes”)
cove = man, chap, fellow
cow = someone or something which is unpleasant or objectionable (such as used in the phrase “a fair cow”); can also refer to: a large female adult mammal (regarding cattle especially, but also including others, e.g. elephants, seals, whales); (slang) a woman who is annoying, nasty, stupid, or unpleasant
cuss = a person, an animal, a fellow (especially a person or animal who is annoying or stubborn, odd or strange); a curse word; to curse, to swear
Decalogue = another name for the Ten Commandments (the commandments given to Moses, mentioned in Exodus 20 in the Bible)
girth = the circumference of an object; a person’s waist or middle (especially used regarding someone with a large or fat waist); the part of an animal around which the girth (a strap or band to hold a harness or saddle in place) is fitted
grub = (slang) food
hove = heaved (past tense of “heave”); threw something which is heavy
Jack Reidy = an Australian boxer
See: 1) “Boxing: Read v. Reidy”, Tasmanian News (Hobart, Tas.), 18 February 1911, p. 1 (Sporting Edition)
2) “In defence of Darcy”, The Referee (Sydney, NSW), 25 July 1917, p. 8
Kurnalpi = a town located north-east of Kalgoorlie (Western Australia); it was established as a gold-rush town, now abandoned
lock-up = police lock-up, police cell, jail cell (also spelt “lockup”)
lock-up was a log = a reference to the practice of chaining arrested criminals to a log, if no police cells were available (especially the case in remote and bush areas of Australia)
mulga = a small Acacia (wattle) tree or shrub, especially Acacia aneura (known as “true mulga”), although also referring to similar Acacia species, such as Acacia brachystachya (umbrella mulga), Acacia citrinoviridis (black mulga), Acacia craspedocarpa (hop mulga), and Acacia cyperophylla (red mulga); can be prevelant in arid areas of Australia, such as the mulga shrublands of Western Australian (“mulga” may also refer to the wood from a mulga)
mullock = rubbish, nonsense; something of little or no value; can also mean to ridicule, tease, make fun of, used in the phrase “poke mullock at” (from “mullock”, referring to mining refuse, rubbish)
’neath = (vernacular) beneath
nigger = a black person; someone of black African racial background; in an historical Australian context, most likely used to refer to an Australian Aborigine (usually regarded as a derogatory term)
o’ = an abbreviation of the word “of”
old red, blue and white = the Union Jack (the British flag, also known as the Union Flag), usually rendered as “the red, white and blue”
Palmer = the Palmer River, located in north Queensland (the area around the river was the scene of a gold rush which occurred in 1873, spawning the Palmer River goldfield)
Perth = the capital city of Western Australia, located on the south-eastern coast of WA
pom = someone from England
prime = (in the context of meat) prime (top quality) beef; prime meat
prog = food; food obtained by begging; can also refer to the act of prowling or searching for food to steal
reverb’rant = reverberant
row = a noisy argument, conflict, disturbance, or fight; an argument or dispute; a loud noise, commotion, or uproar
stamp = a battery stamp: a machine which uses a heavy metal vertical arm, or multiple arms, to stamp down upon and crush ore, so that minerals could be extracted; the building in which such machines are located (also known as a “stamp battery” or a “stamper battery”)
wire = telegram; a message sent by telegraph
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