Election Skits: Next Day [poem by “Kookaburra”, 11 August 1916]

[Editor: A poem by “Kookaburra” about the Whittlesea Shire elections. Published in The Evelyn Observer, and Bourke East Record, 11 August 1916.]

Election Skits.

The Kookaburra woke up one morning, and after a shake and a laugh said to his friend the Magpie next door, “What’s all the stir about?” “Don’t you know,” said the Mag., “Why all the Whittlesea Councillors are going to be sacked and we are going to have a general election.” “An election,” said the Kook, “ha, ha, ha, ho, ho, ho, ha, ha, ha, now we’ll have some fun. I’ll just have a look around after breakfast and see what’s doing. I’ll let you know the news to-morrow.”

Next Day.

1.

There is Johnnie the Contractor,
Wants to be a leading actor
In the drama that is played at Mernda now.
Johnnie says he can’t get beat,
But if so he can retreat
To the tin can band associated with the plough.

2.

Charlie Mitchell has a job
Trying to block Johnnie’s lob,
For they’re trying to bowl Charlie out up there.
But old Charlie says he’ll stick it,
And if they can knock his wicket,
Why Jack’s welcome to the honour — he don’t care.

3.

There’s a land of milk and honey
Where the people who have money
Have to drop it when they try to get their member in.
But their candidate don’t worry,
Though financially he’s sorry,
He is always game to try and try again.

4.

But don’t care a bloomin’ rap
If he don’t win in the scrap,
’Twould be money in his pocket if he’d lose.
But he’ll have to show his face
If he wants to fill a place;
If he lost he’d be afflicted with the blues.

5.

Leslie Clarke will have some trouble
To upset the latest double
That are trying hard to keep him in the rain.
But if Leslie’s friends are stout,
And know what they are about,
They will work and send our worthy leader back again.

6.

Wuchatach also has a trial,
For they say he is disloyal.
W. says he’ll make them prove it at the bar.
And if J. N—— don’t retract,
Then the law will start to act,
And he’ll just begin to wonder where he are.

7.

Jim and Bill will do a skip,
For ’twould give them both the pip
To be cadging votes and kissing babies now.
There’s no need for them to roam,
They’ve their wife and kids at home,
So we’ll see them lose those creases from their brow.

8.

With the Kookaburra’s laugh,
Everyone must get some chaff,
Though when Jackie’s laugh is ended no great injury is done.
We are told the world is round,
So let jollity abound;
Let this good old world of ours be one round of mirth and fun.

— The Kookaburra.



Source:
The Evelyn Observer, and Bourke East Record (Kangaroo Ground, Vic.), 11 August 1916, p. 3

[Editor: Corrected “Lesle Clarke” to “Leslie Clarke”.]

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