[Editor: This poem by E. J. Brady was published in Bells and Hobbles (1911).]
Collar and Yoke.
“’Twas ‘bullicks’ made the country,”
The man from Jindabayne,
Red-whiskered, lean and hairy,
Asserted once again.
The chap from Rocky River,
Squint-eyed and squat and strong —
One eye upon the ridge pole
And one upon the throng;
Declaimed with frantic gestures
His views to reinforce —
“It wasn’t blanky bullicks,
It was the blanky ’orse.”
The day was hot and dusty
The roads were tough and dry,
A brazen sun went blazing
Across a copper sky.
They’d met with friendly greeting
At noontide near the Bend,
But now the day unheeded
Was burning to an end.
While yet, within the shanty,
Those loyal drivers woke
Loud echoes with the merits
Of collar, or of yoke.
The argument from heated
Grew to a yell in course
Confused, of “bullicks, bullicks,”
And “’Orse, and ’orse, and ’orse.”
Now as of old Knights errant
Upon the highways met
Would throw the gage of combat,
And straight to business get,
To prove the charms of Isold
’Gainst those of Guinevere,
Those teamsters just at sunset
Abandoned each his beer,
And on the dusty roadway —
By partisans about
Ringed fairly and encouraged —
Began to fight it out.
The man from Rocky River
A Burns in sooth was he,
In all but skill and training
And build and hittery.
A Johnson — lacking color
Strength, stamina and brain
And scientific teaching —
The man from Jindabayne.
* * * * * * *
The betting on the combat
Was even; for of course
One crowd was laying “bullicks,”
The other backing “’orse.”
Oh, ’twas a famous battle:
Still, in their camps at night
They tell along the ranges
The story of that fight.
So even were they mated,
So blessed, with lack of skill,
They struck, and missed and stumbled
Through forty rounds until
The shanty keeper, acting
As arbiter of law
Relating to the combat,
Declared the fight a draw.
* * * * * * * *
Each combatant exhausted
Prone lying, battered, hoarse,
Could only glare defiance
And whisper “Bullicks!” — “’Orse!”
Nor could they come to corners,
But squatted vis-a-vis
Supine, but still unconquered
Before the referee.
And when — with inward wisdom
Born of the life he led —
He saw from indications
That fight about to spread,
He cried, “This ’ere decision
Is fair an’ just an’ right,
You’ve ’eard the blanky barney
You’ve seen the blanky fight.
Now, some’s for Rocky River,
An’ some’s for Jindabayne,
An’ some’s for ’oof an’ ’orns ’ere,
An’ some’s for ’oof an’ mane.
Since ever I remember,
This argument between
The Bullockys and Teamsters
On all the roads has been.
Now ’ere, I’m bound to settle
Disputes as Referee,
The fight ’as simply ended,
A draw, as you kin see.”
A light of inspiration
Flashed o’er his features coarse —
“Which shows what makes the country is
The bullick, AND the ’orse!”
Now this was sound in logic,
In judgment, and in law,
They called off all the wagers,
Declared the fight a draw;
And o’er replenished glasses,
The wreck from Jindabayne,
The ruin from the River,
Shook hands in peace again.
Source:
E. J. Brady, Bells and Hobbles, Melbourne: George Robertson & Co., 1911, pp. 55-59
Previously published in:
The Bulletin (Sydney, NSW), 22 April 1909, p. 14, col. 1
Editor’s notes:
an’ = (vernacular) and
as’ = (vernacular) has
barney = argument; fight
blanky = substitution for a swear word (such as “bloody”)
bullick = (vernacular) bullock
bullocky = a driver of a bullock team
Burns = Tommy Burns (1881-1955), a Canadian boxer, born Noah Brusso (of Italian descent), who became the world heavyweight boxing champion (1906-1908); unlike many other boxing champions, Burns fought across the “color line”, and boxed against various non-white opponents; Burns lost his world title when he was defeated by Jack Johnson (an African-American) in a match held in Sydney in 1908
’eard = (vernacular) heard
’ere = (vernacular) here
’gainst = (vernacular) against
Johnson = John Arthur Johnson (1878-1946), an African-American boxer, who became the first black world heavyweight boxing champion (1908-1915); Johnson won his world title when he defeated Tommy Burns (a white Canadian) in a match held in Sydney in 1908
kin = (vernacular) can
o’er = (archaic) over (pronounced the same as “oar”, “or”, and “ore”)
’oof = (vernacular) hoof
’orn = (vernacular) horn
’orse = (vernacular) horse
shanty = a pub, especially an unlicensed pub; may also refer to a small roughly-built cabin or hut
shanty keeper = someone who owns or runs a “shanty” (a pub, especially an unlicensed pub)
sooth = (archaic) truth
supine = lying down on one’s back, lying down face upwards; showing apathy, indolence, inertia, laziness, or passivity; not acting due to moral weakness or moral slackness
’twas = (archaic) a contraction of “it was”
vis-a-vis = with regards to, in relation to; compared with, in comparison with; in company, together; a counterpart, an opposite; sitting, standing, or situated opposite another; face-to-face with, a face-to-face meeting (from the French expression “vis-à-vis”, meaning “face-to-face”)
[Editor: Changed “jestures” to “gestures” (confirmed that it was not a created word, designed as a play upon words (re. “jest”), with reference to the same poem as published in The Bulletin (Sydney, NSW), 22 April 1909, p. 14, column 1).]
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